Feminist Forum: "Inclusion-Exclusion"

The discussion of the topic "Inclusion and Exclusion" within the feminist community began with a comment expressing concern with getting more feminists involved in activities. How can feminists in CR groups transfer their experience to community activities? Is the Cleveland women's community open to both "straight" and lesbian/feminists? Several women expressed the opinion that the women's community is very open to all women who want to participate. One women felt excluded because she was somewhat older than most active feminists. Someone suggested that if this woman would work with other women, she could break down social barriers. But the woman responded that she had been working for quite a while with younger women. commented that perhaps her personality prevented contact, since she is basically very shy.

She

What about women who don't volunteer for pro-jects? Should they be or are they excluded? Some women have heavy time and energy commitments to work spheres outside the women's movement. Working with other women does provide  ́an easy way to know them; it gives còmmon topics for discussion and a basis for interaction. A few women suggested that contacts outside of projects tended to feel "superficial", at least at the beginning. One woman, referring to her early perceptions, said she had first viewed the women's community as "small, awesome, and monolithic", but that after making contacts with individual women, she felt that her original image was not true. She now sees the women's community as a very inclusive place, or at least is unaware of problems of exclusivity.

Perhaps we unrealistically expect that the feminist community should be totally different from the rest of the world. A woman said that the community is "not what I thought it was", it's different from my original picture of it, but that's OK. She sometimes felt exclusions because she was too young, rather than too old. Does it make a difference if people intended to exclude others or if they do it unintentionally? Perhaps the people who feel excluded are attributing a source of power to a certain group of women.

Around this time, a figure with a black cloth bag covering her face and most of her body walked into the room and took a seat. After much laughing and a few comments such as, Are you going to take the bag off?", the discussion continued. The unidentified person, wearing socks that said "trust me", sat quietly. Separatism brings its own kind of security, said a woman. In Washington D.C. a woman could be excluded on the basis of the length of her hair or by going to the "wrong bar". The Cleveland area is much less exclusive. Another woman new to Cleveland said that at first she felt that she wasn't "political" enough to be totally accepted, but now she feels included. Another woman walked in, noticed the bag-person, and began laughing. She asked the group how long we had been talking with the bag-person in the room. The answer was "about twenty minutes". The woman finally asked/told the bag-person to take the bag off. The woman underneath the bag revealed herself and her feelings. She said she was glad to take it off and that she could never have tried the experiment without support from a few people in the room who had discussed the idea with her. She felt very powerful in the bag, though she wanted to take it off.

The woman who had come in later thought we should discuss our reactions to the black bag because she thought they symbolized the way

Daqe 4/What She Wants/May, 1977

women act toward each other every day. In the women's bar, women come in and feel included or excluded and talk about their feelings. Opinion was divided at that point over whether we could gain more by discussing the bag-person or other events. Straight women have claimed to be "incredibly oppressed" at the women's bar. The question was raised, "Who is the 'in group'?" that many women claimed to be oppressed by. There is a kind of consciousness that operates whereby people express their identities. Whereever they got their identity from, they will make those factors very public. We need to become aware of what we're doing.

may

Some women returned to discussing the black bag. A review of our responses included the questions "are you gonna take it off" and "do you want to take it off". To this, the bag-person responded with an "I don't know" shrug of her shoulders. There be a difference between inviting someone to reveal themselves, demanding it, or asking when it will happen. Would the woman have kept the bag on all evening? We and she did not know. One woman pointed out that just by coming to a public place, a woman is reaching out, though she may be wearing a "black bag". There are also many subtler kinds of cues. To ask someone to come out of the bag means that you can accept a wide range of behavior.

A woman talking of general feelings of exclusion said she often felt herself on the "outer edges of information". How do we become a part of something? Does it take time, person-to-person contact, or a certain atmosphere? "Taking the steps" to bring someone in "makes your defining ability important. You must assure that you have control over your own definitions of reality, explained a woman. Returning to the bag, it was

brought out that three or four people in the room knew beforehand about the experiment. That shared knowledge probably affected others reac tions and may have brought about feelings of col lusion. In big cities, research shows that we tend tr "push away demands" of strangers as "noise" w don't want to bother with. A woman suggeste that such tendencies could account for why we ig nored the bag person. One factor in such situations is "How long has it gone on?" Some people don't want to intrude on another's personal space. One reaction to the bag-person of "Well, it's her game", implied that the speaker was willing to give all her power away to the other. A short time was spent discussing the power involved in self-isolation, putting ourselves outside the group by wearing black bags. Doing this gives power, or at least perceived power. We attribute motives to people wearing bags, partly because we are frightened by differences. Giving up our own power means that other people are better than we are.

The woman who had worn the bag said that the laughing helped; it made her feel better. The consensus was that once you walk in dressed in a bag, you can't really take it off unless someone insists. That means intervening in someone's space. Sometimes we do want our "privacy" invaded. "Personally, I don't feel my space is invaded enough" by other women, said a woman. Invading someone's space could be an act of caring. If we followed our own curiosity about people, we could get to know them in a spontaneous way. We could start breaking down our assumptions about others by saying "hello". But why is it so hard for some of us to be friendly toward others, especially strangers? Maybe just saying "hello" and "goodbye" is enough contact to make newcomers wel-

come.